Love & Dating | February 22nd, 2023
For The Love of a Rattler
By: D'Aja Byers
With Valentine’s day the highlight of February, love is definitely in the air. The culture of having a special someone near on this specific day puts pressure on those who long for a special connection. Love can be found in the most hopeless places, and how we view love sets the tone for what we need and want.
Although many people dread being alone on the most anticipated day of the month, others are still on the market and actively searching for the perfect match. The conversation on what it takes to receive someone’s love is a triggering conversation within itself. Even more, triggering is the discussion about relationship deal breakers.
At the #1 public HBCU, it is time for rattlers to find their quest for love on the hill and discover their must-haves and deal breakers in search of love.
In the current climate, where having standards and expectations on receiving someone’s heart can go far beyond general understanding, single women and men on the hill want nothing but the best in exchange for their hearts. What draws them to a person is more profound than what meets the surface and personal – as it should be.
Campus Love
Jaleigha Williams, a 21-year-old Boston native majoring in pharmacy, speaks deeply about her experience with love on campus. Williams has spent most of her time focusing on her personal life goals and extracurricular activities while her search for love has taken a back seat.
Although most of her time has been occupied over the previous years when asked, “have you ever been in love on campus?’ Williams laughed before detailing her experience.
“Yes, for what I think love was at the time. I mean, I learned a lot, and if I had to rate it, I would say a 4/10,” said Williams.
The compassionate, goal-oriented, and loyal cancer, who defines love as “respect and appreciation” and considers her love languages to be “quality time and words of affirmation” over physical touch, details what it takes to receive her love.
“A dominant man that’s open to expressing his feelings, with no baggage from past relationships or flings. He has to speak highly of the women in his life, maintain confidence, know what he wants in life, and keep up with himself,” Williams added.
No stranger to commitment, Williams believes that taking time to learn about a person and spending quality time sets any man aside from the rest, and being straight up from the beginning “will get you a long way.”
Like many college students on campus, self-love is a MUST, and the conversation of a scrub is one Ave Tanner knows nothing about – or strays far from. As a 20 – year old college student majoring in childhood education from Broward County, FL, Tanner gives a glimpse of what she looks for in her future partner.
“They must be someone with a good heart, great sense of humor, good personality, family-oriented, and most of all educated. Someone who presents a challenge and is consistent with what they want,” said Tanner.
Tanner’s experience with relationships on campus has taught her not to force anything and that the best relationships come from friendships that evolve into something more as time goes on.
In relationships, it is common for many people to have likes and dislikes that help them choose their love interests. More important than the two, must-haves and deal breakers in a relationship set the tone for present and future connections.
When asked, “what would you consider a deal breaker when searching for the one?” Tanner took a second to think before quickly responding to the question.
“Honestly, just doing something you wouldn’t do in front of me, like lying – because why?” Tanner jokes. “I am someone who is still learning myself in this journal of life, flipping page by page – and being honest with myself is something I value as well as being honest with others,” Tanner continued.
Self Love
Looking for love is never easy, especially for those young and still finding themselves. Although true, some people still believe it’s all about the journey and where it takes you – which can create the best love stories.
Willis Charlemond, a 22 – year old Broadcast Journalism major who spends most of his free time at work or the gym, agrees with that statement all too well. His ongoing quest with love is motivation to become the best version of himself.
“I learned you can’t force anything; you gotta let it come to you. It’s so much outside of college to look forward to. Your person may not be where you expect,” said Charlemond.
Charlemond, who describes his ideal relationship as being with someone “who put him in his place” while still being able to “vibe with no extra stuff,” is very vocal about what he thinks meets his eye when it comes to a woman.
“She’s gotta be independent, kind, and comfortable with being herself in every situation. She’s gotta be her own boss, know how to cook, and be there for me,” said Charlemond. “Being there, especially in low moments, allows me to open up and feel comfortable.”
Charlemond is a Scorpio who never shows his cards. He is ready to orchestrate an eventual checkmate whenever he speaks on his experience of always being prepared for a game changer. His ability to go with the flow and match energy has created a safe dynamic for his heart to be still vulnerable and open to the experience of love.
Even if it does not always result in marriage or a long-term relationship with “The One,” love teaches us everything we need to know about life. Regardless of your life stage, love will eventually teach hard lessons when you least expect it.